Tears Held Back By Pride (Part 1-5) by Leila Harris

Something lodged in her throat and her eyes were hot,Her heart cries but by God her eyes would not,

He stands there waiting, his demeanor pleading for her to react,Begging within himself that she wants him back,

She sits and folds her hands willing herself not to speak,Thinking that if she were to break she'd appear too weak,

He paces the floor back and forth then sighs out loud,He balls up his fists and wonder why woman are so proud,

She puts her face in her hands to hide her watering eyes,She contemplates how long she can prolong their goodbyes,

His breathe catches in his throat as he realizes,That all women and their ways he most surely despises,

She clenches her teeth as the anger pours in,She can do without him someone else's love she'll win,

He stifles a laugh cuz he knows in no time he'll discover,Maybe someone not as good a friend but as good a lover,

She raises an eyebrow at the idea,That he might be the cause her monthly wont appear,

Then both of them at the same time open their mouths to say,"Please, don't go with all my heart, Oh Dear God, STAY",

But with seeing the others mouth open neither one spoke,And with a faint whisper "goodbye" the silence he broke,

He left without closing the door or even waiting for her reply,And as he got into his car they both began to cry!

Part 2

He sat in the driveway just for a minute or two,Grinded his teeth in fury and said, "I dont need you",

She watched the rain fall while drinking a glass of wine,Whispers to herself, "Suck it up, you'll be fine,"

At a red light he shuts his eyes trying to forget how he felt,How her smile and dazzling eyes always made him melt,

She hugged herself imagining him when he was still there,How he'd hold her and tell her how much he really cared,

He thought about how she smelled so sweet all the time,Then felt despair at the thought she'd never leave his mind,

She felt nauseated laying on the bathroom floor,Hoping that she was making herself sick and nothing more,

At arriving home he splashed his face in the kitchen sink,Slammed his hand down on the counter and went to get a drink,

She dragged herself up the stairs a hand on her throbbing head,Cried as she undressed and slid into bed,

After drinking away his sense he slowly lost his pride,What have i done, he thought, but the knot had already been tied,

She could hear the front door open she knew who she wish it could of been,But from the words, "Honey, I'm home" she knew it was her husband.

Part 3

8 months later.....

He woke up every morning with a bottle in his hand,That toxic drink through his every vein ran,

She clenched her swollen stomach while knocking over a glass,Closed her eyes tightly and waited for it to pass,

He no longer recognized his own disheveled place,He stumbled around disoriented with an unshaven face,

She sat down and dialed her husbands phone, Wishing by some miracle that he'd come home,

He tripped over himself when his phone began to ring,He immediately recognized the voice but didn't understand a thing,

"I know you haven't heard from me and might not want to hear what i have to say,But im pregnant and in labor and my husband is away,

"He sat and tried to listen to the words flowing in his ear,"Are you listening to me?" She said, "Please I need you here,"

Her lips began to tremble he hadnt said a word,She understood completely she must of sounded absurd,

He sighed deeply then said, "Why are you asking me?", I haven't heard from you in months nor knew you were having a baby,

With that she heard a click and his voice was no more,"I called" she said to herself "Cuz the baby is yours...."

Part 4

He couldn't take it anymore how could she do this to him,He pulled out his tallest glass and filled it to the brim,

She had to call the hospital now she'd just go alone,"I cant do this by myself," she said and moaned,

He heard a knock at the door loud and precise,He didn't answer at first but did when he heard it twice,

The ambulance had arrived she was ready to go,They helped her out the house with her bag in tow,

He opened the door saying, "Can i help you?"The man said, "Yes, my car's low on gas and my phone is dead too,

"They helped her into the ambulance asked her if she was ready to go,She nodded her head and said yes, but inside she wanted to say no,

In his drunken daze he told the man to come on in,Directed him down the hall and told him to use the phone in the den,

She grasped her purse tightly scared out of her mind,Tried once more her husbands phone hoping he'd make it in time,

The man dialed his wife's number in the den while he waited on the outside,But the man saying, "This is your husband, Will, whose John?" took him by surprised,

She didn't know what to say none of it made any sense,And she knew the possibilities running through her husband head must of been intense,

John stepped into the den after hearing his name,"Sarah, answer me!" the man said, "Before I go insane,"

"I'll explains things to you later just please get here", Then she hanged up the phone out of fear,

John turned to the man named Will his eyes on fire,"Are you married to Sarah? Sarah Elmire?"

They took her into the hospital put her in a room,Prepared her for delivery and told her the doctor would be in soon,

"How do you know, Sarah?" Will said, "This kind of coincidence is rare,"John let out a boisterous laugh, "Oh to not let her tell you wouldn't be fair,"

The fear, anxiety, and pain was slowly driving her mad,Thinking if she'd of done things differently the problems she might not have,

Sarah's husband glared at him like a snake ready to strike,"Come on," John said still in his drunken state, "Lets not fight,

"Sarah's forehead was accumulating sweat and her breath was coming short,"Please give me something for the pain!" She said squeezing the nurse's hand, "It hurts!"

Will swung at John, missed and he fell into the door,John shattered a glass across his head and Will laid still on on the floor.

Part 5

John's body began to tremble, had he just killed a man?He backed away staring at the blood on the broken bottle in his hand,

Sarah was having complications she could hear it in the doctor's voice,She heard him whisper to the nurse, "We really have no choice,"

John stood over the phone contemplating whether the police he should call,Decided against it and went to the kitchen in search of more alcohol,

Sarah's heart was beating strangely fast something wasn't right,The nurse said, "We have to perform a C-section or you won't last the night,

"John drank until his consciousness slowly began to wane,And within a few minutes Will awoke with his head pulsating in pain,

They pushed her through the corridor on a mission to save her life,She knew if she were to die it would serve her right,

Will phoned the police sitting outside John's house in his car,The operator told him a cop on patrol was on his way from not too far,

Sarah was ready for surgery so the doctor began to make the incision,But before long something went wrong and the doctor had to make a decision,

The police arrived and asked Will questions while he held an icepack to his swelling head,When an officer approached them and stated, "The guy in the house is dead,"

Sarah could see her baby, could hear he had healthy lungs from his cry,A tear ran down her cheek, "I want to raise my boy, God, don't let me die,"

"No wound," the officer said, "No signs of a possible fight,Just plenty of empty beer bottles, he must of drank away his life,"

Sarah's doctor was doing all he could to keep her alive,But she was too tired and too weak to survive,

A few hours later Will sat in the hospital after an extremely long day,His pride was hurt, his wife was gone, but he wouldn't cry, NO, he wouldn't go out that way.

The End.